Did the car not lock? Did the meeting drag on forever? Did you have to skip lunch and put up with everybody being rude to you? What you sent out there returned to you as a reflection of the “war inside”.
One day as I was walking out the door of Disney on Ice show, I overheard a conversation between a mother and her 5-year-old son. “What did you like most about the show?” asked the mother. “The sword that you didn’t buy me,” was the reply.
Sadly as it happens, we often think more about what we don’t have or don’t do or who we can’t be, and this creates a feeling of dissatisfaction and disappointment inside. Once there, this negativity can flow through into every aspect of our lives being unnoticed at first but then slowly becoming our reality.
What we feel inside we project into our external life and then receive this projection back. It is almost like looking in a mirror where what we see is a reflection of us and it is like in that mirror that everything we feel inside, be it enthusiastic and happy or lethargic and sad, comes back to us through the reflection from other people, events and circumstances in our life.
Feeling anxious for example, is quite normal before an important presentation or a job interview or some other important event.
It is when we start imagining everything that could go wrong and dwell on it without a resolution, that things quite often do go wrong and turn out as a worst possible outcome and then we say to ourselves “I told you so” as if to complement the mind for creating this misfortune.
And really, who did it? How often do we revert to blaming our luck, our genes, our parents, our environment for the life we are living? How do we create patterns in our lives with the jobs we don’t like, the relationships we can’t keep or the habits that are doing us more harm than good?
Trying to control our external circumstances and situations is hardly an answer. As you probably know, it takes a lot of effort, energy and stress to make changes in the outside environment and even if we do succeed we often find that the real underlying problem is still there, only the scenery has changed.
It is mostly because there is a deeply rooted belief that we “don’t deserve” a better life, that we are not “worthy” of a great job, big love or a healthy body.
These beliefs form part of the programs we accepted at the subconscious level and the scientists today are finding more and more evidence of the influence of our mind on our body and the outcomes we are creating for ourselves.
Seeing the events, people and circumstances in your life through the dark coloured glasses of negativity not only recreates the pattern, it also makes your mind and body more susceptible to the disease.
Chronic stress has been linked to almost every major illness people acquire. Changing our beliefs and programs at the deepest level has such a ripple effect that all of a sudden you notice a shift in your own behaviour, thoughts and actions and through other people, events and circumstances start receiving a different reflection.
And it is not the mirror that has changed! More and more people are discovering their own ability to create great outcomes by freeing their mind from the programs and limitations that no longer serve them, by changing their projection, letting go of negativity and adopting new beliefs.
It comes down to the choices that we make and the responsibility we take because of our own free will.
Sharon for example, had it really tough being in an abusive relationship and having to go through court to protect the children and herself.
She was in a job she did not like, her new relationship started to follow the same pattern, and she was feeling stuck. Using hypnotherapy she uncovered deeply seeded beliefs that she was meant to be lonely and unhappy and that she was not worthy.
Determined to resolve it once and for all, she was able to let go of these beliefs and her life took a dramatic turnaround. No longer did she feel needy of other people’s attention, she was able to end an unhappy relationship without regrets and fully knowing what she wanted, and she found gratitude for having the job whilst enrolling into a career changing course.
No matter how difficult things may have been for you in the past, any pattern of negativity, any program holding you back can be changed.
Anya Haldey runs Positive Coaching & Therapy, a business that focuses on assisting people realise their potential in business and life. Contact her at change@positivecoaching.com.au
